Without revealing too many details, the only other Wiccan I know (personally) is a woman old enough to be my grandmother, who devoted herself to the Path at a time that would mark her as a first generation American witch ("witch" here referring to the modern usage). Although she is American born and bred, she identifies as a British Traditionalist Witch. It seems as though her greatest annoyance with the Wiccan/Pagan community is with the growing Eclectic Wicca movement--but we've had some disagreements about the whole Initiation issue as well.
Of course, someone who has gone through a formal Initiation experience, who has progressed through the traditional levels of teaching, will naturally vouch for their own lived experience, especially if it was significant to them. Even more so if it was performed well! However, I hardly need to point out that many second and third generation witches did not have the benefit of nearby covens, and many readily accessible sources have vouched for self-initiation experiences. For many of us, self-initiation was simply a matter of course. It may or may not have been as powerful as some of the initiation rituals I've seen described in older sources, for many reasons. First of all, if the fledgling witch is not well versed in the transformative aspects of ritual or, even worse, completely unaware of them, the whole thing might have come off as empty or even silly. This, probably more than anything, leads to people turning away from Wicca.
I have recently been reading some of the fourth century baptismal homilies of St. Cyril of Jerusalem and St. Ambrose. Interestingly enough, both of these men described the meaning behind baptism and the other sacraments of initiation only after the catechumen had experienced them. It has been posited that early Christians relied on the mysterious aspect of their rituals to enact a greater change in the individual. Baptism was, in their eyes, a figurative death and rebirth as a member of the Church and a believer in Christ. If one were to go back to The Witches' Bible by the Farrars, one will see the same kind of ideas. Mystery and secrecy were major parts of Wicca. Now, just about every aspect of our religion is laid bare for anyone who can afford a book from a thrift shop. And what has happened as a result is something the Catholic Church fought against for centuries.
Up until the Reformation, scripture was written in Latin and the under classes were kept deliberately ignorant, for if they could read the Bible, they might offer alternate interpretations. Once the cat was out of the bag about Wicca, just about anybody could write just about anything about it and sell books. I think this is when Initiation, the three hierarchical levels, and the Witch's Pyramid (the corner of which is secrecy) began to disintegrate.
The Wicca my friend practices is not the same as my Wicca. Is this a bad thing, though? Maybe she's stuck in the past, or maybe I'm too loosey-goosey. Or maybe we're both right. Maybe there isn't even a "right" or a "wrong." It's interesting though--we can call both Catholics and Protestants "Christians" and still be correct because they worship the same god. Besides that, some denominations have very little in common. But I can't even claim that my friend and I worship the same gods! She believes in the traditional Lord and Lady, while I work with specific named deities. We celebrate the same holidays, but not in the same way. What is it that binds us together, makes us somehow "the same"? Is it just the name?
I think Wiccans are rapidly heading for (or have already collided with) a huge existential crisis. When there are no more first generation witches, when there is no one who practices "the standard," will Wicca truly still exist? Or will "British Traditionalists" become a group like the Christian "Shakers" that died out a hundred years ago? Wicca is evolving, that's a fact. And as it evolves, it splinters off again and again like the branches of a tree. Everything on Earth evolves. So, I guess that great truth applies here again:
As above, so below.
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